Monday, August 17, 2009

Apologies

Dear M,

I am sorry that I yelled at you right before bedtime tonight.

I am sorry that my calm didn't hold out just 5 minutes longer.

I am sorry that more often than not my frustration seems infinite and my patience seems finite.

I am sorry that many times I fail to be the mommy I long to be.

I am sorry that even though I said to stop, you persisted in shoving your crib into your sisters.

I am sorry that I almost cried when seconds later you looked me straight in the eye, with your big, serious, innocent expression and asked me to sing "Happy Birthday, Jellybeans" while I brushed your teeth. I choked back the tears as I sang, because suddenly I realized how fleeting the time is that you will let me brush your teeth, let alone sing to candy while I do so.

Because look how much you've grown up in just the past 2 years.




I love you, little buddy.

Mommy

3 comments:

  1. I love that you sing to candy :)

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  2. I could write those apologies most days...sigh...we just keep at it, right? They are learning and hopefully we are too. I love reading your posts!

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  3. Alicia you aLmost made me cry- I love your honesty. Too may times I go to bed with regrets of how many times I've lost my patience during the day with the kids ask god's forgiveness and pray for tomorrow to be a better day- maybe I should just say sorry to them.

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